Lesson #11: Know Yourself

Note: If you’d like to see all the lessons, click on the category: Making Big Things Happen

It’s hard to accomplish your dream if you don’t have a good sense of your strengths and weaknesses.  What I know after a year of getting ready to go on this bike ride is that I am stronger than I thought!  But I also realize that I am no Tillie.  I am a story writer and teller, not an astonishing athlete.  You don’t have to be a super athlete to ride your bike to Chicago, but you do have to be in a certain kind of shape. I’ve come to accept that I don’t have as much control over that as I’d like to.  I’d like to be able to say for sure I will make it on ‘my own two wheels,’ but I have come to accept that getting there is more important than getting there by bike.

My stubbornness in insisting I do this all on my bike has caused me a lot of stress.  I have to accept that I like to have more control than a project like this is going to allow me.  And I have to learn to let go a little.  If I achieve my end goal—making a book come alive for you—then I will be content, whether I ride the whole ride or not.

I may look like Tillie, but I'll never ride like her. There is only one Tillie!

Lesson #10: Make Your Team

Note: If you want to see all the lessons, click on the category: Making Big Things Happen

In the last lesson, I encouraged you to reach out to others who could help you.  But guess what?  Not everyone gets to be on your team.  Only you can decide who can be close to you as you try to achieve your goal.  Sometimes even your best friend–your Dad–people very close to you normally–do not get to be on your team.

Your team is an idea you hold in your head.  You don’t have to tell anyone about it.  These are the people you go to for support or advice when things are looking bad.  How can you tell who to pick?  Well, let me give you an example.  Let’s say you want to try to qualify for your school district’s spelling bee.  You share your idea with some people.  How they respond will give you an idea of who should be on your team.

YOU: I think I’m going to try out for a spot on the District Spelling Bee Team.

DESIREE: My sister, Cassie, tried out and she didn’t get on the team.  She got way better marks than you in spelling.  (No.)

BRIAN: You’re going to have to practice a lot.  Do you want me to quiz you? (Yep.)

AUNT PAT: You can do whatever you put your mind to (Probably)

MOM: Your sister tried out, too.  She didn’t get in. (maybe not on the team)

When you talk about your dream, are people receptive?  Do they listen and give you good suggestions?  If so, they are probably good team members.  Are they critical?  Do they slap down all your ideas?  Do they seem uninterested?  If so, they probably don’t belong on your team.

For the Tillie Ride, I have considered lots of different people for my team.  I am happy to say I have a great team!  Here are some of the people you may meet when we show up at your school….

L to R: Alyson, Bob, Sam, Roger, Sara, Austin

I also have lots of kids like you. Marissa (pictured below) is such a great cheerleader for me.  She thinks I can do anything! which makes me think that I can, too.

Me and Marissa in her classroom at Kenowa Intermediate

And if everything works out just right, I’ll be reunited with my dear friend, Vickie, who I met when she was Marissa’s age.  She’s now a beautiful young woman, living and working–and singing!–in Chicago.  Vickie put me on her team (and I put her on mine) a long time ago.  If I need anything, I know I can rely on Vickie.

So build your team!  You will not only have friends for life, you will also stand a much greater chance of succeeding.  We all need a little help from our friends.

Vickie and me mentoring at MLK Leadership Academy

Lesson #9: Reach Out

Note: To see all the messages, click on the category: Making Big Things Happen

No matter what you’re trying to do, you will do it better, faster and more effectively if you reach out to others.  It’s hard to make big things happen alone.  I have tried.  It’s really hard.  The problem with reaching out—and you probably know this from experience—is that you never know what people will say or do.  Let’s say you ask your mom for money for summer camp and, instead of saying: “Of course, Honey.  Go get my checkbook,” she says, “Summer camp?  I just wrote a check for your new tennis shoes.  Do you think I’m made of money?”

Sometimes it doesn’t go the way you want.  Reach out, anyway.  Do it over and over again and it will work eventually.  If there’s no interest or energy, try a new direction.  I contacted bike shops and bicycle organizations and bicyclists and told them about the Tillie Ride.  They were curious, but they weren’t that interested.  So I didn’t take it personally and kept on going.  Don’t get me wrong.  It’s hard.

But you have to keep talking to people.  You have to keep telling your story.  When someone asks what you’re interested in, you might say: “I really want to be a vet and I think it would help if I had a summer job that involved animals.  Do you have any idea, Aunt Shari?  Mrs. Newsome?  Coach Elliott?”

I pretty much gave up on the bike people and concentrated on the Swedish people.  They were a lot more excited.  Then—out of the blue—I got a call from Tom Tilma, who was organizing the 2011 Bike Summit in Grand Rapids.  He invited us to have a table at the summit so that more people could learn about the ride and he paid for our registration.  He also introduced me to David Bosch, who helped me get my bike ready for the trip—he got me a mirror and side bags and a water bottle holder. That’s really going to help on the ride.

So so many people have encouraged me and helped me.  I try not to think too much about the setbacks and the disappointments.  You have to conserve your energy to get to the end of something big and there’s no use, really, thinking about these things.

I am so grateful for the way both of these men got excited about what I was doing and helped me.  I don’t have any pictures of Tom, but here are some pictures of the bike summit and of David with my groovy bike.

With Iver-Johnson bike circa 1901

Me trying to imitate Tillie riding at 'Top Speed.' That's David holding the wheel

David Bosch--Bicyclist Extraordinaire